Gary Goes Car Shopping

This week, the car I bought for store deliveries during COVID, the one I planned to keep until the wheels fell off, had the wheels fall off. It was parked in San Francisco and got hit hard enough to jump the curb. Just about every door panel, front and rear bumper and even the exhaust system needed repair or replacement. My little Lexus IS, with 100,000 miles on it, was supposed to go another 200,000, maybe even 300,000. But the insurance company totaled it.

I’ve bought more than 25 cars in my life, and honestly, I’m over it. Over the process, the pricing, the pattern of nonsense that happens every time. I think buying an RV, with its archaic process and practices outlawed in the auto world, finally broke me. Thanks Camping World. I’m also trying to live by the motto: Debt is the promise of future work. That includes car debt. So this is the story of how I bought vehicle number 26, or whatever number we’re on.

First, I make sure to shop with someone who will be patient or else I go alone. I don’t bring my wife anymore. The last time I did, she took the side of the closer. “Extended warranty? Sounds great!” She doesn’t care about cars. This time I brought my son, mostly to help spot things that would annoy his mom. I'm really buying this so she can drive him around.

Second, I know what I want. In this case, I wanted a cockroach. Something unkillable. A jellybean that would run for hundreds of thousands of miles. I wanted Certified Pre-Owned, so it would be vetted and come with a decent warranty. I was willing to pay more for that. Basically, a new used car.

She needed ground clearance because of our driveway. The Lexus had its front and rear bumpers nearly torn off trying to get in and out. The back bumper cover is still sitting on the side of the house; it would have been destroyed in the accident. She also needed space for plants and instruments. The day I saw dirt ground into the white seats of the Lexus, I knew my vehicle choice had been ... sub optimal. I didn’t want to think about this vehicle again. I already have a Ford and an RV to worry about. I just needed something beyond reliable, with a warranty, and no drama.

So really, it came down to the cheapest certified cockroach between Toyota and Honda. Lexus was too expensive. We only had one because I got a stripped-down, off-lease model during the COVID shutdown for a steal.

I test drove the cheapest certified Honda CR-V first. I had read it was a better driving experience than the Toyota RAV4. I was planning to buy the Toyota, but I needed to rule out the Honda. Due diligence. The CR-V was as nice as the Lexus it was replacing, according to my son, but it had a turbo engine, direct injection, and a CVT transmission. I follow cars closely and that's three strikes in my book. Three knocks on long-term reliability. But Honda does those three things better than anyone else. There's apparently a big difference between say, a Nissan CVT and a Honda CVT.

The next day I went to Toyota, ready to buy the RAV4. I was hoping to feel that it was simply better, even though people said it was less refined. I was hoping for some confirmation bias. I’ve owned two Toyota products already, and my next vehicle will probably be a Toyota. I wanted to like it. I really did. I was willing to overlook flaws.

Boy was I wrong.

The seats were uncomfortable, a common Toyota issue. The cabin felt cramped and gave me the beginnings of a panic attack. The Lexus does that to me too; just a little too tight. The engine sounded harsh and buzzy. The whole thing felt more like a Corolla than a Camry. And it cost more than the Honda. "How do you like it sir?" "Ha! I don't like it at all!"

I started doing the math. I could put some repair money into that Honda over time and still come out ahead. And every owner I talked to with a Honda said the same thing. It lasts. Two hundred to three hundred thousand miles, easy.

So I went back to Honda and put down a deposit on the CR-V. The three-strike cockroach won. It's a boring little silver jelly bean from 2021 with a slow head unit and cloth seats. Perfect. If we she can just keep it on the road for the foreseeable future, that would be great.